Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Kids do say the darnest things.

In my case,ASK the darnest things. ive had a very unproductive week as my term comes to an end. but i also had the weirdest week. every week is weird anyway. but this week is certainly,the numero uno.

Here,i list some of the most frequent questions asked by my students:

1. Teacher,how old are you?
I'd usually shrug. but keep them guessing.. hehe.. so i'll ask them back "how old do i look?". some nice ones will say 22,24 and even 21. how sweet. the evil ones would just jump to "31?". the worst was "50". i know theyre joking anyway.. some smarter ones will say "youre 19/20.. because i saw you last year in your spectacles". LOL.

2. Teacher,do you have a boyfriend?
I get this. FREQUENTLY. almost everytime after the age question. i'd blush. but i really am clueless on how to answer. sometimes they'll pair me up with other single teachers in school. even if i deny them,they'll tease. so in the end i'd just say yes. then they'll be satisfied. aaahhh,those kids.

3. Teacher,what do you teach?
This one lagila i taktau how to answer. ive taught so many subjects i dont know how to make them sound realistic. im sure no one will believe. its cz i dont have a fixed subject. most of the time i teach English. but since moving to the afternoon session,ive already taught Geography,Maths,Science,Civics,BM,Islam,Kemahiran Hidup. amazing,i havent taught History yet... hmm...

4. Teacher,are you married?
I'd love to say yes. so i do. and i'll add in a baby in my fabricated story. then.i'd realise i'd make a mistake. being curious beings,they'll bombard me with demanding questions. ive had one period of lesson lost due to the amounting pressure of having to answer the question related to this lie.

5. Teacher,do you have a Facebook account?
I'll just say no. but,they'd find me anyway. Facebook is really bad for us. i literally mean and experienced the effects. stay away from this overrated social networking site.

6. Teacher,which one of your parents is Chinese?
REALLY! i get this A LOT. i dont know how they got this. do i look Chinese or something? not that theres anything bad about it. but seriously,do i?? some would say yes (for God knows why) some would say no (from my Chinese-English slang?). but its sweet anyways they think im THAT exotic. lol.

7. Teacher,why are your eyes so big?
This one i kena give up la.. i seriously am gobsmacked whenever these children ask me this question. like really... how the hell should i know why my eyes are big? if it is.. alhamdulillah,im happy to have a pair of them... to answer your question,is my question too.

Anyway,those are some questions i can think about now. Ta all you losers.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Hari Permuafakatan.

Last Saturday,for the first time i was invited to be one of the teachers in charge of giving and reviewing the report cards of students on The Parents-Teachers Day (also known as Hari Permuafakatan). anyway,the least i can say is - i felt honoured.

So on this fine Saturday morning i parked my car and walked to the Hall and took my seat. i was Cikgu Faizal's assistant for his class 2 Jujur. a few minutes with no sign of parents,Cikgu Faizal went out to do some errands,leaving me alone.

In the midst of being alone,the parents decided to show up. i was like "why didnt you come when Faizal was here? im clueless". what to do right? i just had to fake it.

Me: Assalamualaikum... nama?
Parent: *something-his-name-is*
Me: *pretends to know what im about to do while searching for the report card with the name* oh,OK.


Me: Aaahh,ok encik,ni report card anak encik. anak encik dapat nombor so and so dengan purata so and so and bla bla bla.. yada..yada..yada...
Parent: *angguk2*

*after a few more explanations and faking professionalism*

Parent: Ok,thank you cikgu.

After he turned his back,i was beaming - with pride. then after a few more parents i felt comfortable. my favourite parent was this Punjabi guy. hes soooooooo nice! and had fun poking fun at his son.

Needless to say,i felt like a true teacher. ive never been proud. being a teacher is awesome - aside from the students,classes and paper works. what is left? great other teachers who have become great companions. thats whats great about being one.